Two Poems By Ryan Scariano

At Times a Blessing
  
I’m good at developing habits.
At times a blessing, but mostly it’s a curse.
My anxiety grows like a shopping list,
Then spills like change from a purse.
  
At times a blessing, but mostly it’s a curse.
Fantasy turns nightmare; the dream sours,
Then spills like change from a purse—
Bought seconds and wasted hours.
  
Fantasy turned nightmare; the dream soured.
What have I made and what have I saved?
Bought seconds and wasted hours,
Life’s gravelly moments, a road now paved. 
  
What have I made and what have I saved?
My anxiety grows like a shopping list.
Life’s gravelly moments, a road now paved.
I’m good at developing habits. 

Because I Barely Remember Myself
  
I doubt they remember me
Because I barely remember myself
Like climbing backwards up a tree
Or pulling empty bottles from the shelf
  
Because I barely remember myself
Filled my life with exclusive debris
Pulling empty bottles from the shelf
Whiskey gone, somehow that’s the key
  
Filled my life with exclusive debris
And lovers who never fully undressed
Whiskey gone, somehow that’s the key
Those desperate thieves always knew best
  
And lovers who never fully undressed
Like climbing backwards up a tree
Those desperate thieves always knew best
I doubt they remember me. 

Ryan Scariano is the author of two poetry chapbooks: Smithereens, published by Imperfect Press, and Not Your Happy Dance, forthcoming from Finishing Line Press. Some of his recent poetry has appeared in The American Journal of Poetry, Rock & Sling, Phantom Drift, basalt, DASH, and Bright Bones: Contemporary Montana Writing. He has an MFA from Eastern Washington University and works at Eastern Oregon University, where he coordinates the tutoring program and teaches First Year Experience courses for underprepared students. www.ryanscariano.com